Over 60 Dating In South Africa

There are around 6.6 million South Africans over 60 now, better than one in ten of the country, and the number has nearly doubled since 2002. A great many of them are on their own. Older women outnumber older men considerably, and far more women than men are widowed. If you are reading this and wondering whether there is anybody out there, the plain answer is yes, and rather a lot of them.

What has gone is the easy way of meeting them. Work has finished. The friends who used to make introductions have their own lives. Children have moved to another province, or to London or Perth or Toronto. And unlike thirty years ago, people do not simply run into each other in the neighbourhood the way they used to.

Which is why a good many South Africans start looking online, and why a site for your own age group works better than a general one.

Why an age-specific site

On a general app you spend most of your time filtering out people who were never going to suit, and fending off messages from somebody half your age with an investment opportunity. Here everybody is in the same age bracket by design, and that changes the tone of the whole place. Nobody has to explain why they are not looking for a nightclub.

The common ground is already there too. Retirement or the lack of it, grown children, grandchildren who may well be living with you, a household you are still running, and the question of whether the family will all get down for December. None of it needs prefacing.

It works on your phone, and it does not eat data

Worth saying because it is the practical question people actually have. Nearly everything here is text and small photographs, so browsing and messaging is light on data. The one thing that uses more is uploading your own pictures, so do that on wifi if you can, at home, at the library, or at one of the children's places. You do not need a computer for any of this.

What people are looking for

Not everybody wants to marry again, and it is worth saying so plainly. Some are looking for a partner. Plenty are looking for company: somebody to have a meal with, somebody to walk with on a Saturday morning, somebody to sit and talk to. Others want a friend and would be quite content if it never became more than that.

All of those are fine, and the people who do best are the ones who say which they are after. Being clear costs nothing and saves everybody months.

Your details stay yours

Your surname is not shown. Your email address and cellphone number are never displayed. All the messaging happens inside the site, so you never hand over contact details just to talk to somebody, and if you stop replying they have no other way of reaching you. Every profile is checked before it appears, and there is a report link at the bottom of each one that stays confidential.

That last part matters here more than most places. South Africa has become a base for organised romance scam operations, and they specifically go after older people, pushing them towards loans or their pension money. Knowing the pattern is most of the defence, which is why it is worth ten minutes on how to spot a scammer before you start talking to anybody.

Meeting in person

When you do get to meeting somebody, keep the first one simple and public. A coffee shop in a busy shopping centre, a bowls club, the tea garden at a botanical garden, or the finish of a Saturday parkrun where there are a couple of hundred people about. Daytime is easier than evening. Tell somebody where you are going and when you expect to be back, sort out your own lift there and back, and give it an hour rather than a whole day. There is more on all of that in our guide to staying safe.

Where to start

Joining is free and takes about ten minutes. A few honest lines, a recent photograph, and a look at who is nearby. If you want the detail, there is a guide to writing a good profile, one on the photo, and one on what to say in that first message.

And if online turns out not to suit you, no harm done. There are plenty of other ways to meet people over 60 in South Africa, most of them free, and the ones who get somewhere usually have two or three going at once.