First Date Ideas For Over 60s In South Africa

A first date at sixty something has exactly one job, and it is not to sweep anybody off their feet. It is to work out whether you would like a second one. That is a much smaller ask, and it makes choosing where to go a lot easier. You want somewhere public and busy, somewhere you can hear each other, somewhere neither of you has to travel too far, and something with a natural finish so nobody ends up stuck. Here are six that do the job.

1. Dinner

The obvious one, and obvious for good reason. Everybody knows how a meal out works, so there is nothing to be nervous about beyond the company. The thing worth getting right is the room. Somewhere with hard floors, loud music and tables jammed together will have you both nodding along to sentences you did not catch, which is a miserable way to spend two hours. Phone ahead and ask for a quiet table. Think about the travelling as well, because a place that is ten minutes from you might be an hour from them. If a full dinner feels like a lot for a first meeting, a late breakfast or a lunch is easier on everybody and cheaper too.

2. Country Walk

Walking is the great secret weapon of first dates, because you are side by side instead of staring across a table, and there is scenery to fall back on whenever the conversation needs a breather. Pick somewhere flat, public and well used rather than anywhere quiet: a promenade, a botanical garden, a big municipal park on a Saturday morning. If you are near the sea, Durban's Golden Mile and the Sea Point promenade are both free and busy all day. Agree the distance beforehand so nobody is quietly suffering in the wrong shoes, and go in the morning before it gets too hot.

3. City Bus Tour

Underrated, this one. The open top sightseeing buses in Cape Town and Johannesburg are aimed at tourists, which is exactly why they work: you both get to be visitors for the afternoon. It is ideal if one of you is new to the city, and surprisingly good even if you have both lived there forty years, because the commentary always turns up something neither of you knew. It also solves the hardest problem with a first date, which is what to talk about. You have a running supply of prompts going past the window and the sitting down is done for you.

4. Cinema

People will tell you the cinema is a poor first date because you cannot talk. They are missing the point. The film is the easy bit. What you are really doing is going for a coffee afterwards with something to talk about already handed to you, which takes the pressure off completely. It is also cheap if you time it right. Ster-Kinekor's Seniors Club kicks in automatically once you turn 60 and takes about 20% off any day, and their half price Tuesday still applies on top of the standard ticket. Nu Metro have a pensioner price as well. Check what your local charges, because it varies.

5. Boating

Plenty of parks and waterfronts still hire out rowing boats and paddle boats by the half hour, and there is a reason it works. It is slightly ridiculous. Neither of you will be much good at it, you will spend a fair bit of the time going in circles, and it is very hard to stay awkward with somebody while you are both laughing at how badly it is going. Half an hour is about the right length for a first meeting too, long enough to get talking and short enough that you can go your separate ways if it is not clicking. Somebody will get wet. It will not be the end of the world.

6. Garden Centre

Not glamorous. Genuinely good. A decent nursery gives you a couple of easy hours: something to look at, plenty to point at, a tea garden to stop at halfway round, and no pressure at all to perform. Stodels have been going since the sixties in the Cape and Gauteng, and most towns have a good independent one. If you would rather spend nothing, the botanical gardens do the same job even better, and South African pensioners get in free on Tuesdays with an ID. If you both garden you will be away, comparing notes on what will not grow for you. If only one of you does, that is fine too, because people are always worth listening to on the subject they love most.